[coldtea]

>How is it that even his dying, it is somehow still about her, and not about him, his wishes, creativity, wants, needs, desires, in his last days? Somehow, this is getting overlooked.

I went and read the two parts and you're absolutely right. They speak of Jake as if he is an appliance, and his cancer as an incovenience to him being a personal proofchecker. Total lack of empathy.

And the writing, even at a time like this in their life, is totally vacuous collection of petty concerns (technically it's also repeative and lifeless, but that's the least of its problems given the lack of any substance and emotional core for what is not a technical post). If that's representative, maybe don't write at all. If you can't be moved by a parter dying, or can't express it while still writing about it and complaining about them not being able to do their usual support role, maybe writing shouldn't be the focus, becoming a better person should be a more urgent task (and by that I mean not self-work, but focusing on the other who runs on borrowed time).