[monological]

step 1: save up money and pay off debt step 2: sell all your possessions except laptop, clothes and a few other things step 3: find remote job step 4: move to SE Asia, join an expat community, enjoy a low cost of living lifestyle

[dirtybirdnj]

Failed at step 1, stuck in a remote and non-technical community with limited to no job prospects. Can't compete with the remote job market.

Its like I crash landed on a remote planet and my space ship is irrevocably broken. I feel like the only solution is to accept I will never make the money I used to, the life I knew is over and I'm just never going to get it back.

It's heartbraking. It keeps me in bed never wanting to leave, it has furthered my intense depression and anxiety. You cannot escape PTSD like this.

[monological]

Your words have a lot of power. You become what you repeatedly say about yourself. If you just changed this one thing, not thinking negatively about yourself or the future, it would change your entire life. You have a lot more power than you think you do. Focus on the things you can change right now. Look around your room. I'm sure you can find at least one thing that needs fixing. Be blessed internet friend.