I agree with you, "whitelist" is a perfectly fine word, and "allow-list" doesn't sound good. I also agree that "mebi-byte" doesn't sound good either, but yes, at least it is sensible.
However, just because a word is OK does not mean it is applicable to all contexts. You can call the list "AllowedClients" or something else like that instead, which explains what is being allowed (since there might be multiple kinds of restrictions that you might wish to define based on lists). (Of course, this is a whitelist mode, and can be described as such.) However, if the program already exists, then changing the name of the setting would be even worse (unless the old name is still available as an alias, but you must be careful to ensure you do not mess up anything by doing so), since that would just break compatibility (you can change the documentation though if the existing documentation is unclear).
Also, in some contexts a word can be confusing and a different word is preferable. For example, if the list has something to do with colours, then using the terms "whitelist" and "blacklist" might be confusing and perhaps should not be used. Likewise, singular "they" is OK, but if singular they is confusing in that context then you should use different words instead.
Still, if some people do not like "whitelist", you do not have to use it, but you should consider what words to use which are appropriate and descriptive. Fortunately, sometimes they do, but unfortunately sometimes they don't because their only consideration is to be not racist, instead of to actually be good.
I also do not like the word "tonne"; I prefer "megagram" (which is more descriptive, just as easy to understand, and not confused with "ton").
Lots of people think whitelist is not fine, and decide to use another term whose meaning is perfectly clear and understandable. You don't like that term, but what would you have people use that's less divisive? Clearly "whitelist" does not work, since it was the initial source of the issues.
However, just because a word is OK does not mean it is applicable to all contexts. You can call the list "AllowedClients" or something else like that instead, which explains what is being allowed (since there might be multiple kinds of restrictions that you might wish to define based on lists). (Of course, this is a whitelist mode, and can be described as such.) However, if the program already exists, then changing the name of the setting would be even worse (unless the old name is still available as an alias, but you must be careful to ensure you do not mess up anything by doing so), since that would just break compatibility (you can change the documentation though if the existing documentation is unclear).
Also, in some contexts a word can be confusing and a different word is preferable. For example, if the list has something to do with colours, then using the terms "whitelist" and "blacklist" might be confusing and perhaps should not be used. Likewise, singular "they" is OK, but if singular they is confusing in that context then you should use different words instead.
Still, if some people do not like "whitelist", you do not have to use it, but you should consider what words to use which are appropriate and descriptive. Fortunately, sometimes they do, but unfortunately sometimes they don't because their only consideration is to be not racist, instead of to actually be good.
I also do not like the word "tonne"; I prefer "megagram" (which is more descriptive, just as easy to understand, and not confused with "ton").