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by alfnor 1043 days ago
> For women marrying since the start of the new millennium:

> Women with 10 or more partners were the most likely to divorce, but this only became true in recent years;

> Women with 3-9 partners were less likely to divorce than women with 2 partners; and,

> Women with 0-1 partners were the least likely to divorce.

https://ifstudies.org/blog/counterintuitive-trends-in-the-li...

> In our sample, only 23 percent of the individuals who got married over the course of the study had had sex solely with the person they married. That minority of men and women reported higher marital quality than those who had had sex with other partners prior to marriage. We further found that the more sexual partners a woman had had before marriage, the less happy she reported her marriage to be. This association was not statistically significant for men.

https://before-i-do.org/

> We investigated sex differences in shoulder to hip ratios (SHR) and waist to hip ratios (WHR), and their relationships to different features of sexual behavior. Males with high SHR and females with low WHR reported sexual intercourse at an earlier age, more sexual partners, more extra-pair copulations (EPC), and having engaged in more instances of intercourse with people who were involved in another relationship (i.e., having themselves been EPC partners). The predictive value of these morphological features was highly sex-specific.

https://doi.org/10.1016/S1090-5138(02)00149-6

> Past sexual promiscuity and sexual fantasies (Predictions 10 and 11). In both contexts, a partner’s concealed past sexual promiscuity (promiscuity) was rated as one of the more upsetting forms of deception (about 1 SD above the overall mean). Ratings did not differ by sex (ps > .05), failing to support Prediction 10. Prediction 11 was supported in the long term, with men’s ratings of a partner’s concealed sexual fantasies about others (sexual fantasy) relatively higher than women’s. There was no significant sex difference in the short term (p > .05). These results mirror those observed for sexual infidelity and flirtation and further suggest that the risk of cuckoldry constitutes a potent form of strategic interference for men in the long-term mating context.

https://doi.org/10.1177/0146167204271303

5 comments

A high number of previous sexual partners is a proxy for 'highly attractive' - people who are hot get partners more easily. It's likely that someone who is hot is going to be more willing to leave a relationship that they're unhappy in because they'll be confident they can find a new partner. Someone who is less attractive (or considers themselves less attractive) will stay in a bad relationship so long as it's better than being on their own.

I would argue that means the person who has had more sexual partners makes a better spouse. No one wants to be stuck in a relationship with someone who's unhappy but unwilling to let go. That's toxic af.

If you use only "hotness" metric, then yea, sure, it is valid conclusion

but since in real world it isnt, then I disagree

1. Conservative think-tank, there's a lot missing from their analysis - "women who married as virgins had the lowest divorce rates by far." - this could be explained by things like the coercive social situation they found themselves in.

2. That source seems of questionable quality - https://familyinequality.wordpress.com/2014/08/27/my-rejecti...

3 & 4 - seem irrelevant.

1. That’s a niche explanation

2. Lots of sources say the same

¾. Arbitrary

People who have more relationship experience can recognize when a relationship isn't living up to what it could be, unexperienced people are just ignorant. It's hard for the grass to always be greener when you live in a windowless box.

Attractive people fuck, news at 11.

People get jealous/insecure when they feel like they're not living up to their partner's experiences/expectations. This is totally a HUGE problem, and also people should never eat any fancy or exotic food because then they'll be disappointed they can't afford to eat it all the time and affordable food has been ruined forever.

So you're saying people who have been in fewer relationships are less happy in their relationships. Most of the evidence points to the contrary.
If you report being satisfied with your relationship to a third party because you think all relationships are like your current relationship and you don't see its dysfunctions, are you really more happy, or just more ignorant?
Happiness is a feeling. If you feel happy, you are happy. Ignorance is irrelevant, it may even be beneficial ("ignorance is bliss").
It's definitely not that black and white, because they're not directly measuring people's happiness, they're asking them to self-report their relationship satisfaction.

If I had a mediocre partner but I thought that was just how relationships were, I'd probably report being "satisfied" with them, even as I wished relationships weren't such frustrating things. If I thought marriage was an unbreakable bond I'd probably also avoid admitting I was dissatisfied with my partner to anyone (even myself!) as a coping mechanism as well.

The opposite could also be true, that people avoid admitting regret over their promiscuous past by convincing themselves that the "experience" makes them better judges of the quality of their relationships
There is no possible measure of happiness beyond self reporting, unless you are a dictator who has decided that all your subjects are extremely happy.
I am assuming those numbers were self-reported. Happy to be corrected otherwise.
This reads like something from an incel forum. Shoulder to Hip Ratios? Are we going to start feeling the bumps on people skulls again?
Do you deny that there are widely accepted traits that are associated with attractiveness?

You joined a conversation about promiscuity, sex, and marriage, and calling anyone with a perspective you disagree with an incel is extremely childish and against our guidelines.

Sure, there are widely accepted traits that are associated with attractiveness. Where did I say that is not the case?

Where did I call anyone with a perspective I disagree with an incel?

I literally said that this reads like something that one would find in an incel forum, and compared the idea that specific measurements of the human body being deterministic of their behavior with debunked science of Phrenology.

I think you're reading too much into my perspective and what I agree, or disagree, with.

They did not call anyone an incel. Chill.