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Specifically, I'm wondering if this particular trait is actually a conditioned response (look up trauma bonding) to narcissistic abuse. Being fully authentic and honest (regardless of the circumstances) is essentially narcissist bait. And it works. It's giving up power to an external authority (in many ways), because it's saying 'here are all my cards, do with them as you will'. It also works well when not in a predatory environment. But 'normal' folks don't do this except in very specific, highly trusting environments, most likely because they know the consequences if they do it otherwise. And very few environments are actually not predatory (as in, have no portion of real or hidden predators). And at the beginning, narcissists WILL make things better when they have someone like that around. They got their supply, and the love bombing, extreme gratitude, etc. will all help make EVERYTHING feel amazing. At a job, they may get promoted (but not too high), or get raises (but not enough for them to not need the job or be a threat), etc. However, at some point dysregulation of one or both parties starts to happen (or one or both parties starts getting bored), and then that gets turned around and the shit starts, and then any authenticity or honesty gets used against the target while the NPD person denies all responsibility, DARVO's, etc. |
It shows how interactions between these different kinds of people play out given different population distributions.
https://ncase.me/trust/