[iambateman]

This is cool! We are thinking about homeschooling and need all the tools we can get.

As an aside, I finished high school homeschooled. A state scholarship requires you to be in the top 10% of your class, so the state added me to a cohort of 120 people I had never met, decided I was 7th in that cohort, and gave me an extra $10k in scholarship money.

So yea, “top 10%” metrics are dumb.

[drBonkers]

To echo my sibling comment, please do not homeschool your children. Find a good charter school or alternative education institution that meets your the educational goals you have for your children and still allows them daily access to many peers and professional adults.

My siblings and I were homeschooled and we all admit it severely stunted our social development during critical periods. Once a critical period's window of opportunity has passed, you forever miss out on the development it enables.

Unmitigated homeschooling is to social aptitude as a nutritional deficit is to physical stature.

[kokorozasu]

haha i was also homeschooled and the 10% is self-reported in my state, so I just checked yes on all of those.

[LargeTomato]

Please, please do not. Homeschooling damages your social skills in a way few other things can. Homeschooled kids lose out on a lot of "free play" where the other kids are learning appropriate social behaviors.

My brother and I were homeschooled for a couple years and it messed us up for like 3-5 years after. I've worked with people who were homeschooled until college and they are very weird, socially inept, and occasionally inappropriate.

[ckz]

Counterpoint: Perhaps peer socialization, particularly in the form found in typical schools, isn't all that valuable.

I'd argue that what serves one best in life is learning to function at an adult level with other adults. Most homeschoolers I've known spent substantial amounts of time in adult company every day. Mixed-age peer groups (as seen in homeschool co-ops) can also create a natural dynamic and expectation for the student to both be a mentor and be mentored (relationship skills one should know how to cultivate as an adult).

Conforming as an 11 year old to the culture and social behaviors created by other 11 year olds in a space where a few overstretched adults struggle mightily (if with good intentions) to create a positive environment is...not an optimal use of that child's time.

Not that most homeschoolers aren't also hanging out with same-aged peers too. Much time is saved by not having the administrative overhead of a school. Lots of homeschoolers hang out with their friends all the time like any other kids do. Having buddies over and gaming until 3am is just as fun either way.

Fully acknowledging that I'm deep in anecdotal territory here and that these are sample sizes where all outcomes will be well-represented.

[iambateman]

I agree with this take. Thanks for your thoughts! Being good at being 11 as measured by other 11 year olds doesn’t seem like it’s a predictor of anything.

I loved being homeschooled for the freedom and lifestyle benefits.

Also your website (from your profile) is legit.

[ckz]

Much appreciated, and thank you for the complement!

I was also homeschooled (and loved it) so my perspective does have a certain tint to it. So much of this comes down to the particular child and parent, which is of course the point. :)

Feel free to reach out if you need another resource or simply to bounce ideas.

[spdif899]

I have several friends who were homeschooled for either most or all of their education leading up to college. All are completely fine.

I also know of people who went to public school their whole life and are weird, socially inept, and occasionally inappropriate.

[actfrench]

I'm very sorry that you had a bad experience homeschooling, but there's little evidence overall that homeschooling damages children's social skills more than a traditional school environment. Many homeschoolers lead very vibrant, active social lives in inclusive communities.

Again, I'm very sorry you've met some people who were weird and happened to homeschool, but it's unfair to pass judgement on a large group of people, just because you met a few who didn't fit your own standards for normalcy.

I've met hundreds of articulate, friendly, intelligent and confident homeschooling families.

I think the myth that homeschooling leads to lack of socialization is largely untrue and a treat to those families who want to create an education that honors their child's unique academic AND social needs.

I could write a lot more on this and I have, in this blog, if you're curious to learn about the real lives of highly social homeschoolers. https://joinmodulo.substack.com/p/but-what-about-socializati...

[ike2792]

I think it depends heavily on the individual parents doing the homeschooling. I had a close friend in college who had serious socialization and anxiety issues stemming from homeschooling. I also know a number of adults who were homeschooled and are very well-adjusted and successful. The parents who homeschool b/c they really have a passion for education seem to do much better than those who homeschool out of fear or peer pressure.