Not everyone is using PHP, sorry. I promise that once you get past the syntax shock, Lisp is not that difficult to grok. It looks like some people here took your comment the wrong way but please don't be discouraged by that. There is a genuine lack of good Lisp outreach, compounded by trolls and bombastic essays that are high on platitudes and low on actual insight, and I'm slowly working on correcting that in my spare time.