[Barrin92]

what does it matter if it's worth it? You can only genuinely believe what you acknowledge to be true, and your happiness has no bearing on what is true, there's no choice involved. The moment you attempt to abolish what you believe, being aware you do it only because it causes you pain, it doesn't even work, you're just sort of trying to desperately gaslight yourself. Reminds me of a short poem by Stephen Crane

A man said to the universe:

“Sir, I exist!”

“However,” replied the universe,

“The fact has not created in me

A sense of obligation.”