[kentonwhite]

You are absolutely right. I'm not going to defend what I did, but the question deserves an answer. I was caught up in my own emotions. Tom not showing up for the meeting felt like personal attack against me. That he was flaunting my "authority", shoving it in my face that he didn't need to do what I asked.

With a bit more maturity and hindsight I know that I should have waited until those feelings had passed before doing anything. That's another lesson learned -- never act when in the grip of your own emotions.

[adrianparsons]

What would have been the correct approach for Tom? Admit early on that something wasn't working? Alert you that there was workflow problem?