[RoddaWallPro]

I relate to this, though perhaps obliquely.

I feel far more peaceful and centered when I am hungover. I don't have a thousand things flying around the edges of my brain, nipping at my consciousness. I just _am_.

Drinking can do that for me too, but it shuts off so much of my brain that eventually, it's like being what I imagine a dog is. Completely reactive, with almost no higher thinking. Not that that is bad. I enjoy it.

If not for how bad it makes me feel physically, I'd probably spend most of my waking hours either drunk or hungover. What that says about me, I hesitate to think about, hah.

I also found that in my limited experience with meditation, I could sometimes find that place of tranquility and "simply being". But it was so rare, and the experience of meditation so frustrating and seemingly impossible to progress in, that I gave up. But I still hold that what I am after in meditating is the same thing that I am after in a night of drinking. Single-threadedness, peace, acceptance.

[ldjkfkdsjnv]

Yeah the issue is its really unhealthy to drink enough to be hungover multiple times a week. But then the question is, what are we saving ourselves for? Life is happening.

I've tried meditation, could never reach a high enough level with it to feel sustained peace/calmness. I should put more effort into it though