[danbolt]

> Ideologies are something you do, which means people act in a patriarchal way, likely based on ideological reasons, often without ever consciously thinking about the underlying ideology.

I think the emotional neglect and detachment you mention (and are mentioned in the comments of this post) are a symptom of the underlying ideology of patriarchy. We don’t always recognize the hidden biases we hold men to, leaving them in a place where the feel trapped and untrue. It’s much in the same way women might have been denied their athletic ambitions because of a destiny prescribed to them. [1] Be it a cruel friend or a selfish lover, I think a lot of men in our lives have a piece of their individuality and humanity supplanted by an ideal that only works in theory.

I can’t claim knowledge of a perfect patriarchy test. That said, since making the distinction between a “good man” and a good person who happens to be a man, I see a lot of my friends feel pressure to be something they’re not. And the thing they truly are often isn’t a bad thing in the first place.

[1] https://www.businessinsider.com/why-womens-ski-jumping-was-b...