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by lastangryman 1100 days ago
How nice to read a long-from piece online, simply and clearly formatted, with no adverts, popups, affiliate links, or such nonsense. Just genuine writing.

> The work was the only thing that kept me out of my anxiety.

I know it's a trope for knowledge workers to romanticize physical work, but I find the opposite when programming. The work increases the mental anxiety.

2 comments

Like in life itself, if you‘re trying to control your programming job too much, you will be just miserable and fuel your anxiety. The complexity and unpredictability of the future can‘t be completely controlled. IMHO the only solution is to believe in yourself, that whatever is thrown at you, you will find a way to cope with it. Otherwise you‘re only worrying the whole time what the future might bring.
Programming is part of my job, but I only have to do it every now and then. However, I'm considering pulling a plug on programming side gigs I do sometimes. It's so intense, the brain feels like it's going to explode+ there's that anxiety and that the whole thing will fail before I can even submit it. I'm not sure the money justifies every time.
It's interesting how different our experiences are. I love programming so much, I'll often forget about food or sleep if I'm building something that really interests me. It's easily the best high I've gotten.
Have you programmed as a full time job before?
For 25 years now.
I’m right there with you. I recently quit my job to recover from burnout. I expected that would involve a break from programming. Turns out I’m spending more time programming now than when I was paid for it. I was burned out on the non-programming parts of the job. I’m relieved to know it didn’t break my love of programming.
You can even get burnt out on the programming parts of the job! Having to do a thing you normally like doesn't mean you will still like doing it when it doesn't inspire you.