[mtlmtlmtlmtl]

Some people just don't have the brain chemistry for it, I suppose.

I'm kind of jealous of your friend. I've been a daily smoker before, and I'm usually able to like do simple tasks and such. But I just get too lazy and dysfunctional. And I feel dumber. Part of me is drawn to that because it's so much easier to be dumb. But I also depend on working memory to make a living and also for my favourite hobbies. Eventually I learned that the only thing that actually works is occasional use. I can't be completely abstinent because then I never actually learn moderation, and I just end up binging again. But if I know I can enjoy myself if I want to, I don't have to be constantly thinking "fuck I want some weed". And then when I do finally give in, there's this shame spiral about it that leads to binging. Whereas now I can just smoke if I feel like it, have a great night of sleep and go on with my life the next day.