[gypsy2023]

I’ve taught school for more than 20 years, starting at an alternative high school and following that with a rural high school, middle school, and even some college. What I’ve learned is that a teacher who speaks up won’t have a job (Questioning why it was okay for our male students to go the gym, with administrators’ approval, to play ball with a male teacher who was supposed to be a role model, instead of attending class.). A teacher who doesn’t watch every word they speak (Explaining that in formal writing, one should not use 1st and second person pronouns and being told by a parent that their precious child shouldn’t be taught the word gender, even though that word was never even spoken.)will end up as a target for uneducated parents or those with a misguided agenda. I’ve been in both of those situations more than once and after 20 years of crying for my kids, crying from the stress, and just generally questioning my sanity at staying in a profession that has become the scape goat for all the problems that our society faces, I’ve just grown tired. I try to discourage former students from going into the profession and have watched 3 young gifted teachers leave the profession in the last year alone. I’ve had training on how to properly search a backpack for drugs. I’ve had training on how to do triage on gunshot victims. I’ve had training and drills on how to barricade myself and my students in my classroom in case of an active shooter situation. And I did it all for one of the lowest pay scales in a state that already is woefully underpaying it’s teachers. I did not sign up for any of those things. If I had wanted to risk my life, I would have been a first responder or soldier. So I’m sure someone will ask, “Why did you stay?” There are multiple reasons to stay: job security, retirement pension, and mainly, my students. I love being able to help my kids and I love helping them realize their potential. That said, I’m counting down days until retirement. I’m looking forward to a new career in which I don’t feel like I have a bullseye painted on my back, being able to sleep at night without the stress, and mostly, I’m looking forward to not having to monitor every word I say and bite my tongue around everyone for fear of community tongue wagging. I only have a few years left and the end can’t come quickly enough.