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by hunter2_
1176 days ago
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You need to move the first "between" into the first bullet point, lest the second and third points have "between" twice. Unrelated to the visual breakdown, there's also confusion (for me, at least) as to whether the first and second points have equal prominence, or if the second point should be of intermediate prominence; the word "usually" shouldn't be introduced except to slightly diminish, but I consider it to be a synonym of "typically"... are we to think the first is 90% and the second is 90%^2? |
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