[msla]

Being mean is noise: It's something the listener has to cut through to get to the actual message, assuming there is one. The fact the noise is in the form of the listener's emotions doesn't really matter, assuming you want to communicate something to the listener beyond bad feelings.

(And, yes, there are definitely people who only really want to communicate bad feelings. Some people have a firehose of hatred they periodically direct at specific targets. Occasionally, they dress it up in language that sounds superficially reasonable and aligned with mainstream political movements; at that point, we call them "Callout Culture Influencers" and they get weaponized.)

Part of communicating is saying things that can be heard. If someone is so emotional over how you deliver your message they can't process it, you have failed at delivering that message. Wasting your time on making someone else emotional isn't really all that rational, is it?