| I have felt similar pain. I’m so sorry. No one should have to suffer the way you are right now. I’m doing much better now. Somatic therapy + touch work is the thing that helped me the most. It changed my life. You need a skilled and caring therapist who you connect with and who makes you feel safe. Easier said than done, I know. I had tried several talk therapists before that - they didn’t really help. It takes time but it is possible to heal. I’m doing it. Like you, I did therapeutic ketamine for a while… it helped but I was still struggling a lot. Then, I found my therapist and that was a very pivotal moment in my healing journey. If there is anything else in your life that can you change to make things easier for you and give you space for healing, then try to do that. I needed to quit my job where I was burnt out and move from my studio apartment where I was living alone into a house with some cool guys. I also started exercising again, which doesn’t cure anything but it is essential for maintaining a good baseline. Our bodies weren’t meant to be stationary. When I go for a hard run, any anxiety melts away, as my brain is too busy managing homeostasis :) It may come back later, but it is easier deal with. I could go on and on about the journey I’ve been on. It’s a lot, but you can do a little at a time, and it builds and builds into something new and beautiful. There was I time where I didn’t think it was possible to feel good the way I do most days now. Sending love your way… good luck friend. You deserve another chance :) |