[jmbwell]

Creating AppleIDs for your kids through Family Sharing and using those AppleIDs on those devices would solve this. You as organizer can view and manage all devices; all purchases are paid through your account (but are tied to the purchaser), and you can set restrictions and require permissions for many activities (including in-app purchases). Plus, all the bluetooth devices remain per-user. And it keeps your stuff out of their stuff and vice versa (though selected items can be shared).

https://support.apple.com/en-us/HT201088

[cortesoft]

I should do this for my kids, yes, but it is still annoying just for my own devices. I don’t want to use my AirPods on all my devices, just one… why can’t I do that?

[miskin]

On the device you do not want them to connect to automatically go to Bluetooth settings, find your AirPods, click on (i) and change "Connect to this iPhone" from "Automatically" to "When Last Connected to This iPhone".