[bipop5000]

Me too. I am from a south asian background. I choose to take care of my parents when they are old as they had done for their parents and so on up the generation tree. Its never a burden, its just a way of doing things. I would like to hope that my children would do the same for me as their value system would be passed down from me and my surroundings. I think its because of the cultural upbringing. I would also add most south asians would agree with my sentiment.

[lotsofpulp]

> Its never a burden

I watched my parents, and especially my mom, give up their entire youth caring for my dad’s excessively elderly parents.

They sacrificed portions of mine and my sister’s childhood to take care of two people, who from the age of 75 to almost 100 (both of them), were a net loss to the family since they did not speak English, could not drive, and “needed” home cooked meals 2 to 3 times per day.

It was absolutely a burden for my family, and I hope to never be the parent that needs chronic care, and I am certainly not wanting my kids and grandkids to give up their youth for my senescence.

[hcurtiss]

It also gets more difficult when your parents can't pay their own way precisely because they've made horrible decisions over time. That they'd take comfort in the fact that their kids will take care of them -- I don't know how that doesn't breed resentment.

No, I will not be squandering my retirement now with the plan that my kids will take care of me. Frankly, I find the very thought of that repulsive.