[anthonyb]

Sounds like you've arranged things so that you're "on" 24/7, or close to it. That's definitely a trigger - in my experience, at least. It looks like you're getting less than 6 hours sleep too, particularly with an 8 month old.

You could try scaling back your after hours commitment to your daytime job. If you didn't have to email your coworkers after hours, you could either work on your side project more (the idea being to get it done and out of the way, then rest) or get more sleep. If you don't draw a "line in the sand" somewhere, clients, work, etc. will just keep pushing you until you can't take on any more work.

The other thing that you mention is "constant deadline pressures" and a client who has "high expectations of quality and time". One of my takeaways from rereading Rapid Development is that (even when specifying everything that they can think of) developers underestimate tasks by 20-30%. It's possible that you or your coworkers are falling into the same trap. I've found that keeping a record of estimates and actuals really helps push back against ridiculous estimates and expectations.

Hope that helps.