I was about to be the third generation of women who relied on formula (grandmother tried and failed at age 20 around 1940 despite plenty of help from her mother, mother didn’t bother at 35 in 1980), but for a modern miracle: portable, configurable milk pumps, good accessories, and something of a data-driven mindset. If one takes this “exclusive pumping” route, or something close (we supplemented with formula as needed early on), you better track production, consumption and baby weight.
Formula now is better than formula in 1980 and far better than formula in 1940, so no one should feel bad about using it, but I don’t regret the effort I put in. I think it’s a lot of why, unlike said grandmother and mother, I got back down to my pre-pregnancy weight without much other effort.
Breastmilk is still better than formula, even today's standards of formula. One of the very cool things about breastmilk is that it becomes more nutrient dense as the baby gets older, whereas with formula, you need to give the baby more and more of it.
Another thing about the weight, all of the expected weight charts are based on formula feeding. You need to use separate weight charts for breastmilk only weight gain. If you are breastfeeding, it's common for doctors to incorrectly suggest you supplement the breastmilk with formula because your baby is "underweight", when they actually aren't. Supplementing with complex carbs like rice cereal is also probably not very good for your baby, with no real upside.
Strategy that we are going with is no complex carbs at all, just supplementing with steamed veggies and fruits now that we're onto solids.
My baby was failing to gain weight at all (discovered with baby scale at home between appointments), and once I started pumping, realized that I wasn't producing much. With an aggressive schedule, I got to an adequate level. We supplemented with formula until I was able to cover all demand.
This is an important point. BAbies need to do hard work to get milk. But when they get hooked to easy milk i.e. formula, they just won't do the hardwork knowing that nipple of bottle is just a heart shaking cry away. Parents fall for child psychology. New moms think they know better than their moms and that they are experiencing something new.
Formula now is better than formula in 1980 and far better than formula in 1940, so no one should feel bad about using it, but I don’t regret the effort I put in. I think it’s a lot of why, unlike said grandmother and mother, I got back down to my pre-pregnancy weight without much other effort.