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by jmathai 1226 days ago
That's probably true and apparent in the midst of parenting. We say kids don't know how great they have it - and it's true. But we adults do and we should bask in it as much as possible.

I'm a nostalgic and expect to become even moreso as I age.
1 comments
stef25 1226 days ago
Sadly the negative experiences are much more negative than the positive ones are positive.

When we get / do / have something REALLY want, the satisfaction will wane very quickly. When something bad happens, it will follow us for months.

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BLKNSLVR 1226 days ago
> When we get / do / have something REALLY want, the satisfaction will wane very quickly.

REALLY wanting things is, IMNSHO, indicative of not yet having reached a full level of maturity. I've felt the emptiness of the satisfaction of consumerism enough times to be able to suppress my immediate emotions and apply a thick layer of reality to it (generally along the lines of 'when the fuck am I going to have time to indulge in that, in amongst all these other things that I do with my time, I'd rather have the money than the thing sitting in a corner as another reminder that I have but one life to live'[0])

Also, focusing on the negatives is a choice. Bad things are to be moved on from, not to remain tethered to. (admittedly, this is incredibly variable depending on the psychological damage and susceptibility of the individual, but even so, one must always try to not let past negativity define the future).

Something I REALLY wanted, was to be able to rollerskate backwards (noticeably not a material thing, but a personal achievement / goal). Took me 18 months of monthly / weekly conscious effort and discomfort, but fuck, I can fucking do it, and look like a pro at least through an amateur's eyes. I'm telling you, that satisfaction doesn't wane! Not for me anyway. That's a fucking lifetime achievement for me, at my age, and I don't care if it would be two weeks work for a 10 year old.

[0]I've recently commented to my long-suffering better half that it feels as if we're trying to squeeze one and a half lives into one.

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stef25 1226 days ago
It does apply to consumerism and you're right when you say we should let too much of this in to our lives.

Was more thinking along the lines of the satisfaction of say having a "perfect" child or your dream job (whatever that may mean to you) vs one that has a grave illness or a job that truly blows. You're going to suffer much more from the latter then find joy from the former.

Or for example your salary. If you suddenly get double, the joy / satisfaction from that will wane fairly quickly even if a few weeks before you imagined it would solve all kind of problems.

Or the toughest one imho: being a relationship with your dream girl / boy vs that relationship ending. You're probably not going to wake up every day thinking you're super happy but if you really get your heart broken you'll suffer for months on end.

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