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by jmcmaster 1240 days ago
ADHD weaker object permanence means that lots of people need to see their stuff to keep it in mind. “Hiding stuff” is problematic (and so is clutter).
7 comments

Non-ADHD weaker clutter tolerance means that lots of people need to hide stuff to keep it from bothering them.

Clutter intolerance can have a profound impact on daily life for sufferers. Many will engage in maladaptive coping strategies such as ritualistic tidying and avoiding cluttered rooms or spaces. Whether tolerance can be improved through therapy is an area of active research. Unfortunately, clutter intolerance is thought to be neurobiological.

I had a couple friends barge into my suite and tidy everything up because they were worried about me.

“There, doesn't that feel better?”

“Yes [I will say anything that will make you go away, and then I will cower in the corner of a room that is no longer my bedroom in a suite that is no longer my home]”

This is hilarious -- though I have been shamed throughout my life for clutter as though it were a moral defect.
The problem is that someone else does it. If I put a thing away and find a spot for it I will remember. But if someone else without my hierarchy for stuff does it it will inevitably land in a place I will not even think to search in the first place.
Exactly. I'm already busy keeping the means and motivations of my completing a task in working memory, adding more cognitive load increases the chance that I get derailed and have to gather myself again.
Hiding the belongings of someone with ADHD is disabling them. Work with them, not against them.
I have this, though it most often shows up as "to-do impermanence" -- I have to keep tasks very visible or they disappear. Come to think of it, I'm a bit like the guy in Memento, I even need to remind myself of the whole history and motivation for a task every time I come to it.
Can confirm. My wife still "hides" my stuff all the time, but she's gotten better at leaving it alone, and some stuff in the bathroom I had to very explicitly spell out that it needs to be exactly where it is and it needs to always be visible. We definitely compromise a lot, but I'm glad she tries to work with me on it.
No, it's the opposite. Things placed randomly and visibly just add to the mental overhead. They easily distract.
This is the issue for me.