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by whstl 1245 days ago
I can relate. I actually had a friend tell me "if you ever think of killing yourself, get in touch with me" after an acquaintance committed suicide. Well, I did have a depressive episode and got in touch for help, but got radio silence. Soon after the friendship was dead, he lost interest and couldn't hang out. Now I rely on therapy only.
1 comments

I don't want to excuse your ex-friend's behavior, but I'm afraid a lot of people have no idea how to be of use to a friend who's going through such an episode.

Suggestions to those who don't know what to do:

Can I take you out to lunch? I found a new spot I think you might like.

Want to go to <nearby park> and take a walk?

Want to play catch?

Want to come over for dinner?

I was hung up for a long time because I don't know how to solve any serious personal problems, so I thought I couldn't be of any use. But just being there for someone, inviting them to something nice, and being a good listener can help. And it might be enjoyable for you, too.

Those are great suggestions, and they would have worked wonders for me. Thanks for doing the work of helping others.

In my case I wasn't even that in need of an ear, as I had a therapist on speed dial. I just wanted to see someone, for life to go on. The sudden distance, silence and unmade plans made me feel like a leper.