[goethes_kind]

I never understood this obsession with going to the gym. Like, my main problem is meeting women at all. Second main problem is impressing them enough to give me a chance to showcase my attractive qualities, which unlike my unattractive qualities, are not in plain view.

Unfortunately, living in a country where meeting any kind of people at all is extremely hard to start with, I barely get a chance to ever even flirt or ask a woman on a date.

At least your friend is getting rejections. That means he somehow managed to figure out how to routinely get in contact with women.

[aidenn0]

> I never understood this obsession with going to the gym. Like, my main problem is meeting women at all. Second main problem is impressing them enough to give me a chance to showcase my attractive qualities, which unlike my unattractive qualities, are not in plain view.

One thing that seems to work is to find an activity that you like, which will also be done along with a significant number of single women[1]. Then just do it and have fun doing it. People are more attractive when they are having fun and less attractive when they are desperately searching for someone. It also gives you a shared interest, which is a natural starting point for conversation. In the worst case, you are having fun, in the best case you will meet someone.

I have had exactly zero relationships successfully start via the stereotypical "someone set us up" "meet at a mixer" "online dating" methods, despite several failed attempts at those. Everyone I went on a third date with was via me doing some activity where I wasn't looking for a date.

There are plenty of things that are out of your control that can sink a relationship. A surprisingly large number of women will flatly refuse to date someone who is shorter than they are, which sucks for short people.

1: A sibling comment suggests Zumba classes. Using this as an example: If you go to a Zumba class obviously looking for a date, you are likely to come off as a creep. If you want to get cardio exercise though, taking a Zumba class instead of buying a treadmill to use at home is going to give you a lot more chances to meet someone, and is a similar time & money investment, so you lose nothing if all that happens is you get fit.

[Hasu]

> Like, my main problem is meeting women at all. Second main problem is impressing them enough to give me a chance to showcase my attractive qualities, which unlike my unattractive qualities, are not in plain view.

Going to the gym helps with both of these problems. The gym is a place you can meet people, being fit makes you more confident and makes it easier to meet people, and being fit gives you attractive qualities that are in plain view.

[sw104]

The gym I go to has maybe 10 female regulars (including my wife). I think the reason it's so low is because of men advising other men to meet girls at the gym, or people going with that goal in-mind.

My wife has to put up with all sorts of weird behaviour (staring, unsolicited advice, chatting up, following around the gym, and occasionally somebody trying to leave with her, which cuts my workout short) just to get a workout. If we didn't live in such a small living space, we'd build a home gym to get away from public gyms.

I know you're not advising that, but I think more-or-less the gym isn't an environment for meeting people, unless it's truly a per-chance meeting where neither side is actively looking for anything.

[jq-r]

I would even suggest to skip the gym (as in body building kind of gym) and go straight to group fitness classes (say Zumba or something similar). Those are choke full of women and positive energy, and finding someone is very easy. I would even go as further and say that you might even get to choose. Ask me how I know ;)

[_e]

Group fitness classes are great because someone else tells you what to do so there is less to think about when you go.

[SuoDuanDao]

hitting the gym tends to up testosterone which makes one more likely to take opportunities to start conversations. A lot of men don't take all the opportunities they have, 'just hit the gym' is helpful in those cases.