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by complianceowl 1251 days ago
I 100% relate to your question and feeling. I too am in my early 30s, and overcame those same thoughts. Those thoughts plagued me from about 26-years old to about 30-years old.

I remember endlessly googling, "Is 26 too late to start programming?", "Is 27 too late to get rich?", etc., etc. Now, my age doesn't worry me one bit. My perspective has changed dramatically when I truly realized a couple of things:

1. 30s is not old. If you live until you're 65 or 70, that means a career change right now would amount in 30+ years in that field. I felt like my life had passed me by at 28. Now I look at a 28-year old and think, "That dude doesn't know how young he is." So now, I have enough experience to know that right now, I am very young, within the grand scheme of things.

2. My thinking was heavily influenced by social media. All it takes is seeing a kid who is 10-years younger than you making double or triple your salary for you to feel like you're too behind. The reality is most people are not making those types of salaries.

3. Do research on people for whom success came later in life -- there's a bunch of them. And we're only talking about public cases; not cases of late success that never made it into the public eye, which I'm sure there's even more of.

4. I've learned to focus on my quality of life (health, financial security, relationships, learning, growing, pursuing things that I'm into, traveling). My goals are not "getting rich", but rather, getting to a point financially where I don't have to work. That will probably take me 10 - 20 more years, and I'm okay with that. I just don't want to have to work when I'm 65.

5. When we find ourselves in this situation, feeling that life has passed us by, we have to throw time out the window. The problem is, we start thinking of ways we can "remediate" the situation quickly. But progress takes time. So do your best to just stop thinking about doing something quick, and really try and change your thinking to putting in the work daily (even if just a little bit), but being consistent.

I feel like I'm ranting, but I relate a lot to this question, and after really coming to an understanding of my personal situation, I was able to truly free myself by coming to grips with the truth.

1 comments

I'm not OP, and I'm 23, but your comment quite resonated with me and I want to thank you for it, as someone whose life feels like a constant wreck ever since I was 16.
My pleasure, friend. You mentioned you are 23. When I was 19, I told myself: If If I don't have a girlfriend by the time I'm 23, then my life will have passed me by. Now in my early 30s, I just laugh at how detached I was from reality.

I'm about ten years older than you. Being 23 years old is like having a superpower -- in terms of time, physically, the likelihood of having less obligations and responsibility.

You got this! You don't even have to rush. All you have to do is put in a small chunk of work in a consistent fashion, and in maybe two years, you'll be light years ahead of most people; can't even imagine how much you'll accomplish by the time your 30.

Put in the work and always keep purpose, priorities, and quality of life at the forefront. It's not how much you accumulate or even accomplish. It's about the quality of your life.

I will keep your advice at heart, thank you for it again.

I don't know if my life will be better than the lives of others, though, as I don't have a degree, and I am seemingly less intelligent than others, which limits my ability to learn as fast/income-wise.

Slowly beginning to lose hope, but as you said "It's about the quality of your life."