[bungeonsBaggins]

How does this work in practice, though? I don't know how this would be possible at all. I have loaned money to family members in the past, and been paid back when they were back on their feet. But if a friend or family member borrowed money and never paid it back, even after they were over their financial difficulties, and never mentioned it or made any effort to repay the loan, it would certainly affect my opinion of them; at the very least, I'd expect them to offer some explanation as to why they weren't able or willing to pay me back as we agreed.

So do you actually mean this, or are you just signaling how kind you are?

[checkyoursudo]

Why would I expect a friend whom I value to repay me? I have given, both in gifts and loans both implicit and explicit, much of myself, my time, my money, my worldly possessions over the years. If I held non-repayment against them, I think that would say more about me than about my friend.

A non-friend? Sure, that might be different.

Anyone can be forgiven of anything, if you are so inclined. No "signalling" required.

[t0suj4]

Asking money back did influence my opinion and that would ruin the relationship over time. That's why I've stopped asking for money and went even further and stopped expecting anything back.

I've picked that up from friends I made in Taiwan. It was mostly paying each other's lunch but there's no reason why it shouldn't work in other areas of life.