[alphydan]

The better question to ask yourself (you the white guy), is would you join a group [insert som hobby like hiking] composed 100% of Cholitas. If yes, are you sure? if not, why not?

*Not singling out Cholitas, but it's a group that may feel "other" to you.

[ShredKazoo]

As I stated, I've had the experience of feeling self-conscious in a group where I was the only white person (or one of just a few). That never happened when I was a kid, but it has happened a few times as an adult.

With regard to the Cholitas thought experiment, I think my major source of discomfort is that at least one of them would look at me and think to herself "he's a patriarchical colonizer" and feel hostility from that. I'd feel more comfortable if I had a friend in the group who could vouch for me. Otherwise I'd worry the Cholitas didn't want me to be there.

I suppose that works in reverse as well -- an ethnic person might look at a group of white people and worry that one of them was present at Jan 6 or what have you.

What I miss from my childhood was the feeling that we're all in this together as human beings and race just isn't important. In the time & place I grew up, if someone was to start denigrating others on the basis of race, everyone would consider them to be an unimportant wacko. In that cultural context I wouldn't feel as much apprehension joining a group of Cholitas.

[switchbak]

I strongly agree. Trading in the "shared humanity" approach for one where we self segregate and pre-emptively expect and search for discrimination at all moments seems like the opposite of progress.

[crackercrews]

If I lived in a majority-Cholita area, I would not give it a second thought. If I lived in an area with not many Cholitas, I would wonder if there was a reason the group had only Cholitas.

[zztop44]

Really? I live in Japan but am not Japanese. I speak Japanese and have many Japanese friends. I’d feel quite different about joining a hiking group that was 100% Japanese as opposed to one that had a mix of Japanese and non-Japanese people.

[crackercrews]

I don't have experience with Japan. But if I were in an English-speaking country I'd not give it a second thought.

[zztop44]

An English speaking country like Ireland? Or an English speaking country like Jamaica, Nigeria or Pakistan?

[crackercrews]

Yep!

[ShredKazoo]

Seems likely there's a Japan/US difference here

[flippinburgers]

I have spent large parts of my life living with and interacting with people who are not my "skin color" so, yes, not a problem at all.

[__turbobrew__]

I regularly attend yoga classes where I am the only man. It doesn’t bother me.

[faddypaddy34]

The better question is would that group let a lone white guy join?

[Baeocystin]

In my experience of being that 'lone white guy' more often than not, the amount of general acceptance I get in any group where I've been the odd man out has been great. Life is very different offline.

[BuckRogers]

I’m a fellow white man, currently surrounded by Mexicans in Mexico. The only white here. No problems at all. I’m treated as an individual and treat others the same.

It’s very refreshing. It’s like the USA in my youth. Back in Chicago the racial tensions with blacks is far more. But still not as bad as one would assume. There’s a few that think their purpose in life is to scold you. A lot of that is just culture though, victimhood culture is permeating all racial groups in the US.

[ROTMetro]

Heck yes. But I'm weird that way. It took me until I was in my 40s to realize the majority of women I had dated would be defined as black in most people's eyes. I hadn't even thought about race or defining anyone. I'm super white with blue eyes but my dad has what my mom termed a 'Mediterranean complexion' and my grandma was even 'more Mediterranean' with 'kinky' hair (she wasn't being racist just trying to point something out to me that I failed to understand, even after her pointing them out). My poor mom. She tried to explain my grandparents didn't approve of my dad because he was different. I was like 'oh, because of his long hair'. My mom gave up at that point.

I feel bad for the woman who kept pointing out she was from Oakland and I kept just treating her like the Santa Cruz surf betties I had dated before not realizing what she was hinting at or that I might be taking her out of her comfort zone. I like to think the date we boogie boarded all day then ate pizza in the back of my truck while the porpoises swam by (learn their schedule Las Selva/Aptos peeps, 'running into' porpoises at the beach adds a little extra magic to a date for valleys not used to it) was good and not too uncomfortable.