[eslaught]

In case it's not obvious to everyone reading here, no one recommends using the cry it out method on infants younger than six months. For younger infants, you should always respond as quickly as possible. Our doctor recommended that we have at least one person sleeping in the same room, but in a different bed, for the first six months. Then we gradually transitioned to allowing him to put himself to sleep, and I finally stopped sleeping in the same room around 11 months. For us, this worked wonderfully. My wife hated it, but that was its biggest downside. Almost overnight, it led to better sleep for everyone involved and the kids have never had attachment issues.

I have spoken extensively on this topic with a variety of practioners, and I've heard plenty of horror stories coming from the cosleeping camp. Learning to sleep by yourself is an important skill, and some parents don't realize they need to teach it. This leads some children to basically never learning, since it gets harder as they get older. There really is a golden window of opportunity (for learning good sleep habits), and while it's not as narrow as some make it out to be, it's not wide open either.

But don't take my word for it. Talk to your doctor and partner and figure out what works for you. And then be consistent about it.

[clcaev]

I think missing a "window of opportunity" with kids "never learning to sleep by themselves" is dubious. Those approaching adolescence develop quite strong need for personal space, eventually. They start rejecting parental company, instead preferring to be alone or be with their peers.

I have one data point to share. An eight year old child decided one day, rather abruptly, that they were "done" with cosleeping and wanted to be in their own room, in their own bed, by themselves. And that was that.

[awillen]

> In case it's not obvious to everyone reading here, no one recommends using the cry it out method on infants younger than six months.

This is wrong. Various methods recommend starting as early as four months (and some recommend a less-strict version that starts earlier but only leaves children to cry for a shorter period of time before coming to get them, as opposed to fully crying it out).

1. https://www.parents.com/baby/sleep/basics/the-ferber-method-...

2. https://www.healthline.com/health/baby/cry-it-out-method

[rgbrgb]

Our doctor (Kaiser) said 4 months fwiw.

[shawabawa3]

I read between 4 and 6 months, when they hit the first regression where they switches from 45min to 90min sleep cycles

[tinco]

In The Netherlands the national advice is 9 to 12 months before separate rooms based on some SIDS statistic.