The one thing that every doctor should have happen to them is to go through the medical system as well for something non-trivial. That usually gives them a lot more perspective on the reality of being on the receiving side.
I don't think they can have the same experience as they are "insiders" to the system. Doctors and their families don't wait for appointments for months, aren't the last ones checked by the nurses in the hospitals, and get a variety of preferential treatment that makes their experience completely removed from the reality that the average person experiences.
My father was a doctor. You are correct: as patients they get preferential treatment. As often do their immediate family members. It's something I'm ashamed about when I look back at my own childhood.
I grew up with a good friend with a surgeon for a father, and my friend is finishing his surgery residency now. I watched (with some envy, really) as my friend was able to navigate the process of becoming a doctor with ease. He was no smarter than any other hard-working student, but he had the system working for him to point him in the right direction at every step of the process. (How to allocate his time studying, what kinds of jobs to work, even which foreign language to choose.) I still wouldn’t be ashamed if I were him. He’s good people and is headed to work for the VA (with all its warts, at least it’s free for the patients).
Blatant favoritism is obviously wrong in the treatment of doctors and their families. That’s not what I’m talking about (it’s disgusting). Them knowing how to use the convoluted system is different, though, and I don’t think it’s something of which you should be ashamed. Especially if you/they work to make it a better system.
If the parent comments have made it to this response: I’m sorry for your loss. Watching my healthy grandfather fall apart and die during the peak of the pandemic was a wake up call for me regarding the sad state of our healthcare system.
My/his school offered a Latin program starting as early as the 6th grade that continued through the associated high school. In this example, said system encouraged my friend to take this route (leading to familiarity with the Latin roots of many medical terms). Most folks went the route of Spanish or French. It's not like this made much difference for him getting into medical school, but it slightly helped his progress alongside other similar systemic encouragement (which scribe positions in medical facilities to work during college being another example). Most families/6th graders would never have had that sort of intuition on their own.
This sort of help is available to everyone in the form of internet forums and formal guidance for privileged folks. It just came easier at every step for my friend. Like I've been saying: I don't think this is inherently wrong/evil, but it's something of which to be aware. My family and I are perfectly competent when it comes to navigating this sort of environment, and I definitely considered/wanted being a doctor. I wasn't able to make it along that track. (That being said, I'm happy my lot in life landed me as your average code monkey; it's great.)