[em-bee]

i can confirm that. there is no problem to moderate strangers, but when a close friend acts up in one of my groups it can become difficult. it takes a lot of tact and patience, and if the person is someone close but not a friend it even more difficult.

if the group is small enough, and the discussion is not public, moderation should not be necessary. a group of friends will either tolerate the behavior or as a group they won't. this is not something where any authority needs to get involved and hence no familymember or friend needs to be elevated to that level of authority, even if hate speech or serious insults are involved.

for somewhat larger groups, a downvoting model like hackernews would work. if enough people disapprove, a message gets buried without needing a moderator making an executive decision.