[zpeti]

Patronising is thinking you know what it’s like having children without having them.

You don’t. You have no idea of the emotional and practical side of having children, and how hard and how amazing it is, and how it’s the best and hardest part of your life up until then.

Patronising is thinking you know you don’t want kids without having them. You don’t. You have no idea what it’s like.

[AlexandrB]

> Patronising is thinking you know you don’t want kids without having them. You don’t. You have no idea what it’s like.

This sentence is the definition of patronizing. It's the same thing parents tell their kids: "oh you just don't understand what it's like, that's why you don't agree with me".

[toomanyrichies]

> Patronising is thinking you know you don’t want kids without having them. You don’t. You have no idea what it’s like.

In this example, who exactly am I being patronizing toward? Myself?

[mftrhu]

> Patronising is thinking you know you don’t want kids without having them. You don’t. You have no idea what it’s like.

... what?

[the_only_law]

It’s “make up random definitions for words I don’t know” day apparently.

[mftrhu]

I'm just confused. I mean, I suppose one could argue that - "you cannot whether you will like something unless and until you try it" - if one was in the mood for a stupid argument: people can and do have opinions on, say, not losing their limbs without having someone chop them off.

They can listen to third parties which had the same experience, have experiences which are similar but less intense, or just use their imagination and figure out whether the person they are - whose values and goals they hopefully know - could possibly enjoy whatever is being discussed.

I still have no idea how someone saying "I won't pursue that because that's not what I want for myself" could possibly be "patronizing", even assuming it could be false.

[the_only_law]

More than likely they associated themselves with and then took offense of the “patronizing” group mentioned by the first comment and needed to reach for a contrived “gotcha” to insult them back.