[PragmaticPulp]

This is the kind of mindset that felt obvious to me when I was young and resented anyone else trying to influence what I chose to do for myself.

But after growing up and having kids of my own as well as watching others' kids grow up with varying degrees of parental involvement, I have a whole new appreciation for adult caregivers who get involved and help shape healthy behaviors and habits in kids.

> your caregivers want you to mind your behavior, because then they don't have to, even if you would've been perfectly fine playing with mud or swearing in school or watching TV all day.

You've got it backwards. The easy way of caregiving is to just not care. Let kids watch TV all day, swear in inappropriate social situations, and whatever else they feel like doing. You don't have to get involved if you just don't care what they're doing.

But anyone who has worked with kids in an education setting can tell you that this doesn't actually produce good outcomes for the kids. There are occasional exception stories where students with minimal parental involvement lean heavily into becoming successful in life, but the more common outcome is that hands-off or absentee parenting styles lead to poor outcomes for the children, including social and personal issues. It's not just about getting good grades just because. It's about learning how to operate and function within a civilized society, as well as how to balance your own emotions, impulses, desires, and other behaviors they need to learn as they grow up.