[kypro]

> I'm the parent of an autistic pre-teen. He's "high functioning" because he can talk, read, write, do math and goes to a regular school. But I can totally see him doing something stupid and insensitive like this. The problem is there are several things he just doesn't understand no matter how many times you explain it to him. There are echoes of this problem in the article:

Would you say your kid is otherwise very caring and sensitive though?

Your comment makes your kid sound mean, but I'm guessing that's not the case at all. For example I'm sure it's common for him to say means things to people he deeply loves simply because he doesn't understand the weight of what he's saying? "You look fat in that", etc.

I just think this is an important point to stress because autistic people aren't monsters. They're usually very loving people who just see things differently.

[navjack27]

Yeah exactly! In the autistic brain and I'm speaking as a person who's on the spectrum but who is also aware of this thing because I'm on the higher end of higher functioning... But in the autistic brain like I try to put myself in someone else's shoes like if someone came up to me and said I looked fat wearing something... My initial, and I'll put it this way for ease of conversation, autistic reaction in my brain is "oh thank you for telling me because I sometimes am not aware of the way something is fitting me and I like to have an external confirmation of what I put on might not look the way I think it does look". But you know it matters on the thing that was told to me in a blunt way but most of the time my reaction to being told something bluntly is not what a neurotypical person would react. Like, to me, I feel it is an "out of control" and "impulsive" reaction to react the way most people would to being told that they look fat wearing something... Which is usually "how dare you" or some other sort of baser reaction. Some sort of a lower level personal insult reaction... And I think that's where the disconnect comes from with these blunt statement miscommunications between people on the spectrum and people not on the spectrum. It's the filtering out of the illogical animalistic reaction and in some cases the autistic person judging the neurotypical person as less in control of their faculties even because they react this offended way... It's almost like, I'm the disabled one I'm the one who's told that I have the problems except I don't react the way these people do all the time but why am I told that I'm doing the wrong thing when they are the one acting aggressive...

But I digress I could go on about this miscommunication stuff for a long time because I seem to have a very unique ability to see both sides..