[account42]

I think that's going a bit far. Having your phone with you and turned on is OK because there sometimes are emergencies that have higher priority than whatever you are doing. Sure, take steps to avoid constant unneeded interruptions but looking at the phone once in a while to see check if a notification is important is not going to kill anyone. You don't own someones attention 100% when you are spending time with them.

And someone doom scrolling while "spending time" with others might not actually want to be spending time with those people. In that case the ire should be directed to those people or obligations making them spend their limited time in a way they dislike.

[lrvick]

If someone really deals with life or death emergencies they would likely benefit from a device made for that with multi-week battery life and very broad range, like a pager. Doctors and firefighters still use those for a reason.

Short of that, it is probably not an actual emergency and real human people in front of you should have your full respect and attention with a rare exception being when you are trapped, like on an airplane. If you are not trapped then just leave. Using a phone in front of someone for any reason not relevant to the current activity or conversation is just a passive aggressive insult.

Phones are like toilets. No one wants to watch you use one.

[account42]

Unless you are somewhere remote a charge time > 16 hours might as well be infinite as you can charge it while you sleep. And I'm not just thinking about people being on call where a dedicated device makes sense but just your normal people emergencies that might happen to someone you care about that require immediate action on your part. Sure, those are exceptional but so are many other things you might prepare for. And I'm not saying that you are not allowed to disconnect if that's what you want, but chastising others for having a phone with them and turned on is, well, inconsiderate.

I also disagree that you owe anyone your attention. There are so many more situations where you are stuck being around people that are not you being literally trapped. This is even more true for kids who might not have full autonomy of where they spend their time.

But even when someone wants to spend time with you that doesn't mean that they owe you their attention. Certainly not their full attention for the entire time. Let people daydream a bit and let them check their phone once in a while. Remember that not everyone is the same as you. If get that offended by that then perhaps you're the problem.

> Using a phone in front of someone for any reason not relevant to the current activity or conversation is just a passive aggressive insult.

And sometimes a passive agressive insult is called for.

Also, I am pretty sure there are people who do want to watch you use a toilet.

[lrvick]

If I agreed to spend time with someone I absolutely owe them my attention and respect. To pull out a phone in front of them is to disconnect from being present with them. Everyone says they are still listening when a phone or a laptop is in front of them and they are liars. Some notification will pop up and suck them away and it is 5 minutes before the trance snaps. Rather than passively aggressively insult someone I should just admit to myself I am out of social energy for this situation and leave to be alone.

I have had to resort to offering to buy dinner if people turn their phones off because they are so addicted to being constantly connected to every chat, meme, tiktok dance, and facebook political rant.

All the time I see entire friend groups or families sitting around tables at restaurants all on their phones ignoring each other. It is gross.

I am fine always being the person at the table pushing for the exact opposite of that, and maybe we can all tolerate the middle ground.