[leslyn]

In another part of my life, I am a trained therapist and I would like to encourage you to see a therapist NOW - before the thoughts of suicide return. In the meantime - even though it is a bit 'off topic' - anyone dealing with frustration can use this article: http://www.marcandangel.com/2011/12/11/30-things-to-stop-doi...

So many of the comments in this thread are valid and worth another read - you will never succeed unless you risk failing, period. Keep trying - shoot for small success - take a break - find support - and the best suggestion I read in the thread: stop lurking and start contributing here - be a part of the community where most of us have failed at something a time or ten!