[titzer]

I used to know someone who would constantly use phrases like "I'm not sure we really understand what is going on here..." but it took me many iterations to decode that in fact, they meant "I'm not sure you really understand what is going on here..." With that decoder ring whole conversations turned decidedly more uncomfortable as it was clear this person was not actually working together for mutual understanding or to learn other people's viewpoints but rather harbored a vague hostility towards people expressed in coded means. That actually made me more suspicious of them, not less.

[switchbak]

Do you know that's what they were thinking though? Lots of mistrust can build up when we don't regularly check our assumptions.

[titzer]

I witnessed them do it to other people who were outside "the know" and the joking around in the debriefing made it clear what they thought of them.