Hacker News new | ask | show | jobs
by kaashif 1336 days ago
If you ask people if they know something and they already do, they can sometimes be insulted. I'm never insulted when people do that, I think it's considerate, but I have seen people get all "of course I know that, what do you think I am, an idiot" on me.

I still ask if I'm not sure of someone's level of expertise - I think any reasonable person would react positively.

2 comments

Yup, absolutely; this is yet another angle on empathetic communication. When in the listener's seat, it's important to be mindful of the fact that the presenter is trying their best at the difficult task of conveying this information to you.
I've found it super helpful to frame conversations establishing shared context with "I have no idea what you do or don't know about X" It helps re-center the conversation so that I'm the one who's ignorant, and the other person potentially has an opportunity to show off.