[lansing]

That's great that Facebook "opened your eyes" in a seemingly healthy way. Seriously.

The world was full of ways to compare ourselves with others before social media came around. It isn't going away. Facebook is just the latest iteration, and also happens to be the most surface-level, un-holistic, and competitive channel yet conceived for this kind of behavior.

Once people get competitive about "happiness" and "self esteem", there's a way that they lose sight of the original "goal" in the attempt to outdo each other.

We should all explore the different available paths in life and strive to gain from others' perspective and experience, but the Facebook news feed is not a particularly good way to do it.

[impendia]

+1, but I strongly disagree with you. I learn that: my friends have dragged themselves out of bed to enjoy some new and fascinating experience; after a long and severe effort, they have succeeded at their dissertation/weight loss/exercise program; that after a lot of duds on OKCupid, they have met somebody amazing; etc. There's plenty of surface-level stuff on FB too, but whenever FB has made me "miserable" it has always been over something important and meaningful.

A lot of things strike me as vastly more surface-level and un-holistic: what kind of car you drive, how big your house is, how rich your neighbors are, how immaculate your lawn is, etc.

[lansing]

What if you just decided to "not play the game" and pursue a life that was meaningful to you, on your own terms, instead of waiting for somebody else's Facebook post to make feel you "miserable" and inadequate?

Regarding your final point, as it happens, a pretty sizable chunk of Facebook feed items tend to revolve things like the cars people drive, their house, and their farmville "lawn". At least that's how it was when I was using it. The more things change...

[AznHisoka]

so whenever your friends succeed in something meaningful, you always feel miserable? You never ever feel good for them? (don't be afraid to say yes, because I'm like that.. wondering if I'm alone..)

[impendia]

No, far from always, and not miserable exactly. By "miserable", I mean that I ask myself, "Bob drove to Yosemite National Park and hiked Half Dome this weekend, while I hung around my apartment and surfed the net and watched TV. Why didn't I do something like Bob?"

[gujk]

Because you are content in your surroundings and more energy efficient.