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by thomastjeffery 1332 days ago
> Fuck You.

> TL;DR: I come from the "Treat others how you wish to be treated" school.

You're welcome to give those statements some reflection. I find hindsight to be really valuable, especially after speaking from a place of emotion.

> I find it very upsetting and I take it personally.

Clearly. And that's your business. You are free to ignore my perspective and advice. Your feelings are real, and I'm not trying to ignore them.

I didn't come here to offend, but I did intend to be direct and assertive with my communication. This social pattern is not new to me, and it isn't specific to you.

Indeed, I don't know you. I can only draw from the limited interaction I have had so far. And so far, that interaction has followed the very same social pattern I came here to deconstruct.

That's the crux of what I'm trying to express here: if I'm an employee, and I don't know my boss is going to react positivity to bad news, I'm very motivated to keep my mouth shut. That sucks for both of us, and me keeping secrets would definitely be wrong; but the morality of the situation isn't going to protect my employment.

You can say all you want that you are generous and forgiving, and that you make plenty of room for open communication; but so far, I find your words hard to believe. In our interaction so far, you have been hostile, emotional, and outright refused to hear my perspective. You had an opportunity to be generous, and you did not take it. I get it: you're upset, and that makes it pretty difficult for anyone in your position. In this specific situation, there isn't a lot of trust being built.

I am not here to tear you down. I am here to criticize you. I hope that you can take a step back and hear my criticism constructively, but that decision is ultimately yours.