[mrleinad]

Why do you think one thing excludes the other? Why do you imply that helping others is "outside the real world"?

I´m single, but my experience with people I know tells me otherwise, unless of course your wife doesn´t share the same desire of helping others, in which case I´d say you married the wrong woman for you.

You don´t need to move to Africa or India to help others. The "others" might be on your same neighbourhood. And thus, helping "others", you end up helping yourself AND your family. You just need to broaden your definition of "others".

[hrabago]

They don't necessarily exclude one another, but they certainly can. Whether it matters to you or not depends on what your definition of "others" is, which is what I was trying to point out.