[anonymouse7]

It's hard for many women to be making more than their husbands.

1. They are not socialized to be the breadwinners. 2. It seems unfair to them if they bringing in the bacon, and doing most of the household management and emotional labor, and physically bearing the children.

In the case of no. 2, it's much easier, cheaper, and hassle-free to just to get a situationship, as a woman.

If she's worried you are "taking advantage of the situation", it probably means she doesn't think you are pulling your weight in the relationship. If she's still doing all the emotional labor and the household management (which could include managing the cleaner), then yes, you aren't bringing much to the table.

Generally, what I've seen work personally and with others, is if the lesser earning spouse manages some other part of the household and the relationship. Like SAHMs who run the house and are the primary caregiver to the kids. The lesser-earner also is the one who organizes date night and all that.

She probably needs to feel that she's getting something out of this relationship --which could simply be feeling loved, taken care of, and desired.

[oijnhd]

That is a great point, and on top of that it sounds like he's wearing his resentment on his sleeve.

No doubt if she gets completely fed up of this and leaves, he'll find a way to blame her for that too.