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by JumpCrisscross 1405 days ago
> It's an unpleasant experience asking another parent to tell their kid to stop bullying your kid...and then being told "fuck you"

Then police.

1 comments

> Then the police.

In some regions, this is a bit unrealistic.

I grew up in a neighborhood where the bully's dad was the police captain. The bully would target brown kids and property of their parents (e.g. M80 down the chimney, among other atrocities). Everyone in town new the son acted with impunity. Kids our age knew it was worse: the dad actively encouraged his son, and gave him the M80s. No one would talk about it in public, less they be targeted as well.

Everyone is accountable to someone. Escalate where needed.
> > I grew up in a neighborhood where the bully's dad was the police captain.

> Everyone is accountable to someone. Escalate where needed.

Frankly, this isn't really true-- and shows our immense privilege that we can often act with this assumption and have it come true. Most people don't have this experience.

And especially a couple decades ago this was much less true for the type of circumstances we're discussing.

> shows our immense privilege that we can often act with this assumption and have it come true

I take this to mean that you don't believe people are capable of understanding the system in which they live, nor advocating for systemic changes.

This said, I don't see how this tangent ties to addressing the fact that a community leader abuses their presumed power to protect a bullying child. Outside of doing nothing and letting bad behavior happen, one can address tears in the social contract through a variety of escalation approaches. But the key word is to act. I don't think any human system will protect you without your initiative.

> I take this to mean that you don't believe people are capable of understanding the system in which they live, nor advocating for systemic changes.

I'm saying it takes enormous effort to escalate, and one's results in doing so are pretty closely tied to indicators of social class.

And then, there's litigation, which is expensive and out of reach of most. It's the only functional mechanism that prevents 55% of the population from oppressing some chunk.

edit: I misjudged which thread I was in, and had a bunch more of a reply here that isn't relevant.

> edit: I misjudged which thread I was in, and had a bunch more of a reply here that isn't relevant.

No worries. I didn't see the response or anything.

When normal channels for escalation are prevented, abnormal channels with heavier consequences become cost-viable options. Reading through a history of Ireland's The Troubles is a reasonable place to consider without the baggage of most current political conflict: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Troubles

That may be true but you need to somehow be higher on the social ladder than the assailant. Good luck if you are getting harassed by police to get them to stop you need to have a direct line to the mayor or at least city council.
Social "Ladder" is the wrong metaphor. We live in a mesh without a specifically defined ordering of nodes.

For example, going to the press is an option.

If you go to the press that might make the situation worse. The press no longer provide a significant check on other power structures in government