[mempko]

Debts are what bind neighbors and communities together. You felt bad because you were in debt to her giving but didn't want to have a relationship with that person by reciprocating. Often, the worst thing you can do in relationships is to get out of debt. Debts are a reason for people to see each other. By telling that person to 'stop baking', you told them essentially 'i don't want to have a relationship with you'. (see Debt, the first 500 years by David Graeber)

[mikepurvis]

Great book. Another good one is Sacred Economics by Charles Eisenstein, which covers some of the same ground, in terms of understanding the dynamics that tie together people and communities, ensuring fairness and an appropriate level of redistribution, but with needing a formal money system or taxation. (Potlatching, for example...)

[nlnn]

Looking back at it, I have plenty of good relationships that don't involve debts, maybe because I've avoided any that did.

I've always been very uncomfortable about being in debt to anyone for anything unasked for, that just seems manipulative to me.

I've not read David Graber's book though, added to my (evergrowing...) reading list, thanks.