[smt88]

> have written a poem every day for 400 days straight to her

I'm sure this was a painful lesson to learn, but I hope you took the right thing away from it.

No healthy relationship is going to include 400 daily poems. It makes it seem like the subject of the poems is being put on a pedestal and idealized, not perceived as a real person with flaws.

It comes across as obsessive and, perhaps, insincere -- how can someone have 400 poems' worth of feelings for someone they've known for less than 2 years? And if they don't have those sincere feelings, what are they trying to accomplish?

Read a little bit about "love bombing" (not because I think you love-bombed anyone, but because it might help you understand how the recipient of this behavior might feel about it).

[Ntrails]

> No healthy relationship is going to include 400 daily poems.

A bold and absolutist claim. The GPs relationship was clearly not healthy, but the idea that no healthy relationship could exist where there is a daily poem is kinda ridiculous?

[jrh206]

It's a pretty good first order approximation.

If you've written 400 daily poems and it doesn't seem to be having a positive effect, then it's certainly time to stop. If it's going well, then fair enough, you do you.

[Ntrails]

> If you've written 400 daily poems and it doesn't seem to be having a positive effect, then it's certainly time to stop.

I'd probably say stop at around 7 if not positive, because then it is just a weird week long gimmick...

[Kaze404]

I agree with this. It made me think about the Adam Sandler movie where he finds out his lover suffers from a condition where she can't retain new memories, and at the end of the movie the conflict is solved by them going to live on a boat and him re-seducting her every day for the rest of their lives.

Watching it as a kid made me think it was a heartwarming ending to the movie, but the older I get the creepier it gets. It is essentially a hostage situation if you think about it.

Anyways, not saying this is what OP did, but I guess it's an example of how seemingly sweet and well intentioned actions can also be overbearing. I can't say I would enjoy having someone write me poems for 400 days straight.