[nulbyte]

> Can you think of another way to implement it that wouldn't be just as obnoxious though?

A link to a page where visitors can opt-in would work just fine and not be obnoxious. The banners are obnoxious not because it's impossible, but because the very idea of consent goes against the business' goals. Or their just lazy: You don't need PII to track marketing performance, and if you aren't unnecessarily collecting PII, you don't need to ask.

> I feel like EU regulators should have worked with web standards committees to add a technical means and requirement to classify cookies.

Hardly anyone would use it, because most companies aren't seriously interested in getting consent. They are interested in data, and consent is merely a hoop to jump through.