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by candiddevmike 1434 days ago
Have you ever been through a divorce? Splitting assets equally is an after thought for most folks. They (or the one that filled) just want to get the thing over with, quickly, and a lawyer makes that happen.
2 comments

I have not personally (still happily) married. My cofounder went through a divorce. He is a divorce lawyer (and his wife at the time a lawyer too). They divided everything smoothly - sounded like it was quite clinical and unemotional from what he told me.

Say if you brought assets into the relationship, a house, retirement fund fund, an inheritance. I’m sure you don’t want your ex-partner to get half of that. You’re entitled to keep a larger portion of it (as you get a credit for it). So our app helps people understand that better.

Some people who split everything equally may be giving more away than they should.

This is our version one. I have no idea how it will evolve.

But yes, if you want it done quickly - a lawyer is better at this stage.

May I ask if you went through a divorce?

Maybe lawyers treat divorce like doctors treat dying. Just get it over with, no exceptional measures.
> You’re entitled to keep a larger portion of it (as you get a credit for it).

Doesn't this depend on if you have a pre-nup especially in states like CA? I got married super early and had to divide everything equally even though I earned much more than my spouse.

Not in NY, an “equitable distribution” state. Our mediator informed us that my wife was entitled to maybe 10% of my ipo stock since she didn’t sacrifice or contribute to it (I had a normal salary). Sounds like ny is an exceptionally fair state!
Wow...that does sound quite exceptional. My wife got 50% of all my RSUs and all other equity I earned throughout my career. Nothing I could do about it since it was earned during our marriage and that's the law in CA.
California is a Community Property state, New York is not.

The rules in Community Property states is marital assets have to be divided equally (50/50) in non-Community Property states they must only be divided up "equitably."

Most states with historical ties to Spanish civil law are community property, and a few oddballs too. IRS (U.S. federal tax agency) Publication 555 explains a lot of the basics of community and separate property, including how taxation works in case of divorce. (It is not specifically about divorce, however).

As you can see this represents a large percent of the total U.S. population.

Arizona. California. Idaho. Louisiana. Nevada. New Mexico. Texas. Washington Wisconsin

Also, "The states of Tennessee and South Dakota have passed elective Community Property Laws."

I believe if you earned during the marriage that’s marital property unless otherwise agreed in a prenup (maybe some states are weird but I think that’s the norm). The scenario is more like owning the house you live in before the marriage, then using marital proceeds for stuff like maintenance and taxes. The increase in value since the marriage might be considered shared, because you both contributed towards it.
This doesn’t sound right at all. The classic story is “he/she took me to the cleaners”, fighting over every possible asset, being forced to sell a house or property you don’t want to because the spouse demands half. I don’t know the frequency but it happens. My own parents fought hard over the house in particular and my mother ended up having to buy my father out at a huge loss to avoid selling it.
Divorce does force people to make tough choices. Both people are entitled to a share of the assets they jointly accumulated over time, separate their finances and make a fresh start independently. Keeping or selling the house (the biggest asset) is a hard decision. Selling often means disrupting the lives of the children etc. If property has negative equity, then it becomes even more challenging. In NY, couples can enter into an agreement where they keep joint ownership of the house for a while (eg until the kids grow up). This can only work if they’re amicable. Lots of people don’t want to continue holding a joint mortgage with their ex-partner, so it’s often a decision between sell the house or one person taking over the mortgage.
Many people live near their means. It makes sense that doubling costs like housing, property taxes, and utilities would likely require downsizing or hard choices.