"I'll feel the need to do some work at 10pm on a Sunday night every other week, just to keep things afloat." sounds like a workplace from hell. GTFO ! I've never, in over 25 yrs now as a software developer, had to do that. BTW, public sector may be the way to go. Interesting work, less performance management / competitive cr*p, easier to make real friends at work, mission can be more valuable than some rich person trying to get even richer..etc. Public sector tends to pay less headline salary, right now, but can give career longevity due to less stress and more time to learn stuff properly.
It's more the constant backlog of stuff that needed to be done yesterday, more than a deadline for a specific feature(s).
I have zero control over that, which inevitably leads to the stress of work spilling into my personal life, weekends etc.
I'll feel the need to do some work at 10pm on a Sunday night every other week, just to keep things afloat.