|
I used to rent a place, furniture included, but everything smelled funny. Later in the year, during rainy season, I bought a used raincoat. It too smelled funny, and I soon discovered, by googling, that apparently people with a rubber fetish may do things to such garments. Horrible horrible things. Soon after, I became concerned about my smelly apartment. I started to google, but everything I googled with the word "fetish", returned unspeakable results. Each worse than the last! So I bought new furniture, bedding, cutlery(oh god!), plates, everything. Even toilet brushes are not safe from the horrors, so I bought one of those too. One night, I woke up in a start. An idea was in my head, and I rushed to google, and horribly found that factory workers making my stuff, have fetishes too. Nothing safe, I disposed of it all.
I got out my chainsaw, and cut down a tree. I made plates, cutlery, even a wooden cup! And ate off of these plates and so on. However, just last week, I noticed a squirrel apparently randy and without a mate, doing something to a tree!! There is no end of the perversion I tell you, no end!!! So now I sit in the corner, drool upon my chin, eyes glassy and void of energy. (Brought to you by bbarnett's house, and the embarricon virus.) |