[ywain]

There are studies indicating that past a certain level of income, more money doesn't bring more happiness. As a software engineer you can likely hit that threshold fairly easily even at a startup. I'd choose gratifying work at a startup I believe in rather than grind LC so I can work on some shitty adtech that nobody wants any day.

(That is not to say you shouldn't assume your pre-IPO equity to be worth anything though.)

[bradlys]

I don’t know OPs location but if they’re in SV - series anything isn’t enough to afford the Bay Area long term unless the wife is working at FAANG.

I presume OP doesn’t live in SV because no way to buy just about any home here on a startup salary. Homes where I am went from $2m to $3m in last couple years. These pillars of dust full of termites somehow managed to get even more insanely expensive. I literally didn’t think it was possible to see a shitbox going for $3m outside of Palo Alto but I was wrong.